Trust is one of the ingredients for a successful home, but many times, there are moments when it is put to test, according to marriage counsellors. And if the trust is broken and not repaired, the marriage could crumble. SATURDAY PUNCH asked some people what they would do if they found condom in their spouses’ bags, purses or wherever
If I trust him, I wouldn’t insinuate anything
Olori Opeyemi
Though it is generally believed that the majority of men cheat on their wives, my own husband is not in that category. People say you can’t trust a man 100 per cent, and I agree. But I think I can trust my husband 99.9 per cent. And of course, I keep praying for him not to fall into temptation. Based on this level of trust, I would not suspect him of cheating on me. I would rather politely ask him why condom was in his bag. He’s a gentleman, so he would politely respond. The issue would be resolved amicably.
I’d keep quiet
Henry Maso
I would not be hasty in judging her. In a matter like this, hasty reactions could ruin the marriage and one must be very careful. I believe the devil is not happy with any good marriage and he’s always trying to look for ways to destroy it. I would be careful in my reaction. If I had known my wife for fidelity, I’d keep quiet. I’d not even tell her that I found condom in her purse or wherever. But I’d keep watch on her – just to make sure I’m not mistaken.
It’s a sign of danger
Hameenat Agboola
It’s not a good thing for me to have discovered condom in my husband’s bag or pocket. I wouldn’t be happy and it might make me insinuate that he had started sleeping with other women. To be sincere, it might diminish my love for him. Even if I asked him why he put or forgot it there, he might cook up a story to cover up. But apart from being afraid, I would still ask him and pray that God would make him repent if he had actually started sleeping around with other women.
She has questions to answer
Hafeez Oladeji
This is a serious matter and I have the right to ask her many questions. No man would be happy if his wife cheats on him. As a person, I don’t like hiding my feelings and assuming things are okay whereas they are not. My wife just needs to tell me where she got the condom from. Her reaction and answers to my questions would help me to decide what to do, which I cannot really say for now.
I could help him buy more condoms
Gift Matilda
If a man wants to destroy his life at times, no matter what you say, he wouldn’t listen. That’s how some men behave. Even if you cry and cry, they would tell you nothing is wrong, yet they already have in mind what to do. I’d just buy him more condoms. If he wants to destroy his life, let him continue. By buying more condoms for him, I am letting him know that I’m aware of his movements; I want him to stay safe and not contract diseases. I’d just keep praying and hoping that he would change someday.
I’ll ask her to confess her sin
Wingitari Tella
When you sin, you must confess for you to be forgiven. Why should she have forgotten condom in her bag or purse if she hadn’t been sleeping with other men? I’d be more troubled if I had been suspecting her prior to when I found the condom. However, if I didn’t catch her red-handed romantically involved with another man, I’d forget about the matter, but still ask her if she had sinned against me. If she is willing to confess, I may be willing to forgive her.
I would be happy God exposed him
Debbie Emmanuel
That is just how a man can be exposed. He could have been doing it prior to when I discovered. Perhaps he just forgot to dispose the condom that day. I would not be disturbed because one must always expect any eventuality anytime. Someone you trust today could harm you tomorrow; that’s life. I would be happy that God exposed him because this would help me decide what to do. I’d confront him and if he doesn’t want to apologise, I would take this matter to those he listens to.
She couldn’t have been stupid
Deji Teniola
I don’t think a woman who cheats on her husband would be so dumb to have forgotten her ‘equipment’ in her bag. For single ladies who indulge in the disgusting act, it could be possible for them to put it in their bags, but no matter how bad a wife is, she wouldn’t be stupid to that extent to forget condom in her purse except God wants to expose her, though. In any case, if I trust my wife and I am convinced she could never do such, I could let it go without making a fuss out of the issue.
I would simply withdraw my trust for him
Sinime Anyamalem
I have always known that men could never be trusted till eternity. It’s not even in my DNA to trust anybody 100 per cent in life. People betray, and the worse thing is that it is even the people we trust that betray us. Personally, I would take no hasty action, but I would simply withdraw my trust from him if I found him guilty after my findings. I’d still be with him and that wouldn’t stop me from performing my duties as a wife and mother.
She could’ve been cheating on me
Afeez Ibraheem
I don’t believe a woman would be that careless to forget condom in her purse if she hadn’t been cheating on her husband. If I carry out my investigation and discover that she had been cheating on me, I would do either of two things – to divorce her or to also start cheating on her. Though none of the two is good, but how do you pay a cheating wife back for her sin? Maybe I’ll just allow her to go, while I get another life.
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